Swiftly Moving On... please tell me what you think!

[invisigirl591]

Swiftly Moving on

Swiftly, Swiftly,
moving in the breeze,

Swiftly, Swiftly,
going past the trees,

Swiftly, Swiftly,
running in the land,

Swiftly, Swiftly,
going across the sea,

I ran through life,
not worrying one bit,
now it’s almost gone,
almost over,

I didn’t care,
I didn’t help,
I didn’t teach,
I wish I did,
because my death awaits,

I should have slowed,
not wish away,
It’s all my fault,
and now here I lay,
dead in the grass,
dead in the breeze,
dead in the sand,
dead in the seas,

No one cares,
for I was no one,

Swiftly, Swiftly,
moving on.

This is a poem I wrote. Please tell me what you think or any advice you may have.

[NicholasDWolfwood]

Make it a song and get a guitar.
_________________
-<|>-________-<|>-
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........./\/\/\/\/\/\

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jq6q8fU9PiM

There's no I in Team. There's a Me though if you jumble it up.- Dr. House

92% of the teen population would be dead if Abercrombie and Fitch or Hollister said it wasn't cool to breathe anymore. Post this in your signature if you would be one of the 8% watching and laughing.

[invisigirl591]

Thanks!