ok i need some brually honest how am i doing

[aquaeevee]

ok well as you may have noticed, my gallery is branching out a bit. i need some brutally honest how the heck im doing on my swimsuit figure and ideas on how to improve it besides adding flowers, im already trying that and its working marvelously here are the links. go for it!


http://www.fanart-central.net/pic-722154.html

http://www.fanart-central.net/pic-722149.html
warning moderate nudity [size=18]^[/size]
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with this frame of mind you better pray i never get a point of view gun, too late i just did. just pray i dont aim at you then!

[London]

Adding stuff is not going to help. Find a photo, and use it as a reference. You rly need it.
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[i][size=9]Go Yankees![/size][/i]

[aquaeevee]

ok thnks, anybody else out there for a quick review?
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with this frame of mind you better pray i never get a point of view gun, too late i just did. just pray i dont aim at you then!

[MonsterCandy]

I'll have a go, not sure how good or helpful this'll be but away we go:

So. for starters that front leg is too far forward. Where it bends it should be right next to her hips and thighs... While i've found though trial the bottom part of the pose is possible, it's rather painful and unconfertable.

The Neck looks far too small to be honest. It needs to be thickened out a bit.

The lack of nose bothers me a bit, but that could most likely just be me.

On the one with nudeity, I'd serjest not making nipples just dots on her breasts. At least have them as small circles.

There could be more but i'm too asleep to notice it right now.

I have some advise to help you inprove though, first like London said, use photos for referance. But even better, i'd serjest looking at yourself in the mirror. Watch your body and how it moves and what poses are pysically possible. I have found this has helped me a lot with my work.
Also, i'm not sure if you did this or not, but did you do a quick sketch of what you wanted the picture to look like first? If not, i'd serjest doing this, it'll help in the long run.
I'd also maybe work on your colouring a little, i don't know about you but i find it very distracting to see small white patches on a peace of my work.
With the colour you want, go over where you want to colour fairly lightly as carefully as you can. Then, desided where the light is coming from, and put shade on the oposite side by pressing down darker with the same pencil.

Thats all i have right now. Hope this helps somewhat.

[aquaeevee]

very helpful indeed, and yes i had an initia ref for initial design, which i moved off of. i know the pose is ordinarily painful, belive me i tried it. the neck is actually longer and thicker then it looks, its mostly covered by the coller, and scanners never seem to like color for some reason, hence the odd bits of white. i do however thank you for the critique.

anybody else up to mauling these pieces?
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with this frame of mind you better pray i never get a point of view gun, too late i just did. just pray i dont aim at you then!

[Ryjia]

First I'd like to say that I quite like your piece, ^w^ but you asked for a mauling, so I'm going to point out what bothers me. (Only on the bikini one, my little sister's in the room so I can't click the other now.)
Work on your anatomy a bit, reference helps a lot. For a female the hips should be just as broad or broader than the shoulders, that way she'd look more curvy too. The breasts looks kind of saggy, I don't even think it's the breasts themselves, but I believe it's because of the way the top hangs over them. The arms could be more shapely, they look kind of like sticks like this. Arms a curved around the elbow area and the wrist should be smaller. The legs are too long, legs make half of the human body. Also, they should be less thick where the knees are. The navel could go down a little. Also, colarbone is missing, like the nose, although the last one could be shoved off on style. the jaw could be more refined and she's missing an ear like this.
On the other side, I like how you did the hair, although I don't really get what the heart thingy is and the colouring isn't bad either. I adore your background too.
Again, I really don't think this is a bad piece, I quite like it actually. Keep on practicing!

[Dark_Angel_Of_Light]

What can also help, is that if you try sitting in that same position yourself. If some muscle hurts because you're twisting it one way too much, or or cracking joints because of it, then you'll know that the pose you have in mind, is WAY too unnatural. And the last thing you want is an unnatural pose in your picture. =]

[aquaeevee]

an exellent critique, ill work on those features... my original design i had working off a pic i saw of a playmat for yugioh. the heart was mearly added as a hair decoration. ill see what i can come up with.

that being said, i still would appreciate all the advise i can get so maul away people.

@dark angel, hopefully you will et some time to review the other 1?
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with this frame of mind you better pray i never get a point of view gun, too late i just did. just pray i dont aim at you then!

[aquaeevee]

double post, my bad

still looking for more insight
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with this frame of mind you better pray i never get a point of view gun, too late i just did. just pray i dont aim at you then!

[Dark_Angel_Of_Light]

[quote="aquaeevee"]@dark angel, hopefully you will et some time to review the other 1?[/quote]

I am referring to both, I did look at both pictures. It was more or less just general advice I was giving you.

[aquaeevee]

oh, ok then thnx.


still looking for more maulings people
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with this frame of mind you better pray i never get a point of view gun, too late i just did. just pray i dont aim at you then!

[rambo]

this is something i did that helped me take a picture of the person that your drawing and just draw the head over and over agian from each angle do that for about an hour a day and about three days then do the same with the chest then the arms by the time you finsh the body it will look just like the show just try it also it takes a lot of had work to good luck

[aquaeevee]

thanx for the tip
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with this frame of mind you better pray i never get a point of view gun, too late i just did. just pray i dont aim at you then!