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This Is My Life Story !

 
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kyli-bruce
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Joined: 22 Feb 2012
Posts: 2

PostPosted: Wed Feb 22, 2012 6:25 pm    Post subject: This Is My Life Story ! Reply with quote

This is a story about me, a story about why I could never live in peace with the world we live in. This is also why I could never live in peace with my self. for the next few weeks I will tell you story that might scare you, one that might make you cry. This Is the story of Kyli-bruce 77428d-98. don't worry you will kno what these numbers mean soon enough this is a true story, i am the true story.
where do I start?

I guess I was about sixteen I can remember it all just like if it was yesterday.
I was coming home from school and i remember a man walking out of my parents house. no one I knew I just shrugged my shoulders and went on. about my business. I was rolling up to the house on my bike suddenly
then some man grabbed me and and held me tight as parents house out of no-ware blew up in flames. man I remember I cried so hard that day.
almost everything went blank after that up till I was about 17 and a half.
do know I never went to a foster home but i do call another man dad.
all i know is at sixteen I was normal person but at 17 i had knowledge in weapons such as guns , knifes, swords and a bunch of other stuff
will let go forward a bit. to when I was about eighteen. I was Drafted for war.
I remember the day I died. I was talking to our commanding officer. then i turned around and there he was the man that killed me. It was none other then my.........


to see more check back in a few days...
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luckylace222
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Joined: 05 May 2007
Posts: 1545
Location: Baby Fishy

PostPosted: Wed Feb 22, 2012 8:17 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

This life story sounds like a boastful spy movie.
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“Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checked by failure...than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in a gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat.” ~Theodore Roosevelt
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kyli-bruce
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Joined: 22 Feb 2012
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 23, 2012 6:51 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Is that a good thing are bad thing i'm kinda mixing up parts so at the end
you can get the bigger picture.
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luckylace222
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Joined: 05 May 2007
Posts: 1545
Location: Baby Fishy

PostPosted: Thu Feb 23, 2012 7:54 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I like writing that ends with a good cliffhanger. An ending that ends with a "It was none other than..." turns off usual readers. It seems like a ploy to force the readers to follow the writer just to figure out that one name. Good writers can make the readers anticipate the next scene while also getting the fleshed out details.
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“Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checked by failure...than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in a gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat.” ~Theodore Roosevelt
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