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My Pokemon fanfic

 
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Megamangaman
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Joined: 08 Aug 2005
Posts: 2

PostPosted: Wed May 24, 2006 6:10 pm    Post subject: My Pokemon fanfic Reply with quote

My fanfic is a pokemon story titled Ray's first pokemon. I've think I've got a good storyline: A boy named Ray with his brother and his friend travel go on a quest to be a pokemon champion. So far i've got six chapters, and I'm working on the seventh.
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Astri
How can I get a custom title thing?


Joined: 30 Dec 2005
Posts: 912
Location: Valencia, CA

PostPosted: Wed May 31, 2006 7:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

It helps if you put a link to your story, so other people can read it... ~.^
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[color=blue]Disgaea's [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-31977.html]Overlords Dance[/url] in [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-25745.html]Worlds Beyond Infinity[/url] while [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-27428.html]Mifuyus Magical Multiplying Mole[/url] reads the epic [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-25652.html]Chronicles of Yord[/url], and you learn that your [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-37925.html]Craving[/url] for [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-37922.html]Finding a Heart of Snow[/url] is [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-37924.html]Taboo[/url] in [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-37910.html]VG[/url] unless you dare undertake [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-32962.html]The Combine of Sin[/url]...[/color]
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Megamangaman
Newb


Joined: 08 Aug 2005
Posts: 2

PostPosted: Thu Jun 01, 2006 9:10 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

whoops, http://www.fanart-central.net/story-18716.html
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Astri
How can I get a custom title thing?


Joined: 30 Dec 2005
Posts: 912
Location: Valencia, CA

PostPosted: Thu Jun 01, 2006 10:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I've only read the first chapter so far, but here's what I have to say:

Pros: The storyline is solid, and you have a good sense of humor. It moves along briskly and keeps you going, and stays humorous at the same time.

Cons: Grammatically and structurally, it has some issues.

I think you need help editing your fanfic, but the meat of the story beneath the words is quite good. I like it ~.^
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[color=blue]Disgaea's [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-31977.html]Overlords Dance[/url] in [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-25745.html]Worlds Beyond Infinity[/url] while [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-27428.html]Mifuyus Magical Multiplying Mole[/url] reads the epic [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-25652.html]Chronicles of Yord[/url], and you learn that your [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-37925.html]Craving[/url] for [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-37922.html]Finding a Heart of Snow[/url] is [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-37924.html]Taboo[/url] in [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-37910.html]VG[/url] unless you dare undertake [url=http://www.fanart-central.net/story-32962.html]The Combine of Sin[/url]...[/color]
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Bulletproofskunk
Rookie


Joined: 11 Mar 2006
Posts: 36
Location: under your nose

PostPosted: Sat Aug 05, 2006 12:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

nice! i havn't seen many good pokemon stories . but as astri said a little work on your grammar and you're a for away
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