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moonysgirl
Member
Joined: 12 Oct 2005
Posts: 106
Location: Locked in place I chose to create.
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 Posted: Thu Mar 09, 2006 7:22 pm Post subject: |
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Well,I need some help.I'm stuck with writer's block and would like some advice from the critques.The Other PotterPlease go easy on flaming.
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The question isn't "Would you die for a friend?"
But rather, the quetion should be "Do you have a friend worth dying for?" |
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Fade
Has No Life
Joined: 10 Feb 2006
Posts: 608
Location: Lost in my mental landscape... I think
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| Posted: Sat Mar 11, 2006 5:20 am Post subject: |
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Uh...get a beta writer? I can't really read things that lack seperate paragraphs. And try to make things a touch longer. It's not bad, it's just too segmented and broken. Smooth it out. I'd give you more but...
(P.S. cute penguin! I won't poke it though)
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[color=blue]Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.[/color] |
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